A few years ago I watched a variety of random new movie releases and sequels that sounded fun and that I would be heartbroken to miss. The four movies I made it to- Jumanji, Star Wars, Pitch Perfect 3, and The Greatest Showman didn’t sound on the surface like they would have that much in common. But I was astounded to realize they really all have the same theme when it comes down to it, underneath the great soundtracks, special effects, big stars, and plot lines. The theme of every single one all came down to hope.
Hope dashed. Hope on the edge of extinguishment. Hope forgotten. Hope in more than you can currently see and currently even believe. Hope for more.
I mentioned to a friend recently that 2017 was a hard year for me, and I knew before it started that it would be bad. He exclaimed- you knew it would be bad? How could you have possibly known that?! You can’t sit around expecting a year to be awful- then regardless of what happens, it most certainly will be!
I’ve thought about this a lot over the last week, and I totally agree. What you expect is what eventually comes to pass- one way or another. But hope- hope is the tide that changes the heartache, the pain, the confusion, the impossibility, even the death, into something new. Hope is what gives fuel to move you from pain to possibility.
And sadly, hope is one of the first things to go in burnout. Hope fades as reality grows. This is the way it is. This is the way it will always be. This is the hand you’ve been dealt. This is what you cannot overcome. This is where the gaming ends and your good luck runs out. This is where evil takes over and the resistance falls. This is where your dreams and goals fade into nothing but sad memories. This is where putting it all on the line makes you end up with nothing. This is the end.
When life deals you a blow- be it an unusual loss, a harsh and boring reality, or an impossible dashed dream- there are only two responses. Give up and walk away. Or hold on like hell to hope regardless of what you see, what you wished, what you cannot resurface, and what you cannot even imagine anymore. Hope is a candle that flickers and fades but still has the power to light a house on fire, if you will not let it die.
But what if you’re like me, and hope already died? A flimsy wick snuffed out by too many losses, too many pains, and too many dashed hopes and you end up burned out by the very things you worked so hard to get? How do you recover hope when it seems lost? Practically, it takes several steps.
1) Mourn the loss. For the hard working overachievers, this is the hardest part. We shake it off and keep going so often. We don’t want to admit the fears, the loss, the hardship, the pain was there. We want to keep going. But the first step to actually changing things going forward is to admit the past. Admit that loss hurt. Admit what was wrong and needs to be changed. Admit what gives you energy and desire to keep going forward. Admit what would take you out again. If you never take the time to mourn your burnout, you’ll find yourself in it again far too soon.
2) Forgive it. This sounds like a strange recommendation, but you have to make a decision to move on from where you were. Forgive yourself and your situation. Forgiveness in the Bible, for instance, doesn’t mean “keep bringing it up and rehashing what you left behind.” It means to let go and walk away. And this is exactly what we need to do in our careers- mourn the loss and frustration in a way that allows us to get up and walk away and not look back.
3) Dare to dream. The last step is to look up. Stop looking at whatever it is that is making you afraid, upset, dejected, or depressed. You make an effort to think of a possibility for more than you can see. Dream of the impossible until you start to see the possibility in it. Sometimes this means you are not planning for the biggest, most impressive new endeavor. Sometimes it takes starting with the smallest- going to the park today, to walk outside once a week. Walk until walking in the park allows you to see beauty there instead of a requirement that allows you to rethink the drudgery. Until you see even the past as a possibility for more.
Need some more examples? Honestly, check out any of the movies I listed above and how these characters overcome defeat! And check the website for more tips and blogs about overcoming burnout.